Umbrella’s lighter offshoot

Chris O’Carroll,

a native of Cambridge, Massachusetts, has performed at theatres, comedy clubs, and poetry reading venues in more than half the 50 states.  It was in Kansas that he first saw a vehicle accessorized with truck nuts.  Travel is so broadening. 

In addition to his previous Umbrella/Bumbershoot appearances, Chris has published poems in The Barefoot Muse, The Chimaera, 14 by 14, Measure, and other print and online journals.

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Truck Nuts

Dangling from the pickup’s tail
With shiny chrome to coat ’em,
They swell the bulbous outline of
An ornamental scrotum.

More like a bull’s than like a man’s
(Some studs may beg to differ),
This pair is guaranteed to make
The driver’s pride stand stiffer.

A lad is sure to set himself
Apart from other lads
When he revs up the engine
Of a truck adorned with nads.

Lesser guys in lesser rides
Can only whimper, “Ouch!”
As the testosteronemobile
Blows past with this prime pouch.

There is no manly attribute
One can be thought to lack
When, mounted on the highway, one
Swings such a well-stuffed sack.

Tooling through life, the driver may
Encounter sad days, slow days,
But nothing slacks his gleeful speed;
He’s rolling with cojones.