Seriously Funny
{A Bumbershoot Special Feature}

LaDonna English

is an avid reader and observer of life who has taken copious notes for 40 years and has just begun to publish her poetry.

Her poems have appeared in Read The West, Modern Haiku, Mid-America Poetry Review and The Raintree Arts Council Literary Journal.

She has been a homemaker for 28 years and is the mother of five children and the grandmother of five.  She lives with her husband, two youngest children, and a menagerie of animals on a 150 acre horse farm in Louisiana, Missouri where she enjoys horseback riding and nature.

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Environmental Progress by Star Buck Smith, Jr.
Grade 4, Exxon Elementary School
Vermont Island, North America

Back in 2083 they made the world’s first penguin tree. A plantimal they made of genes from cactus spines and penguin spleens. The mix they used worked out real well. It liked the heat. It didn’t smell like penguins used to do before they went extinct.

There were no more because they walked on rocks and dirt that got so hot their feet would hurt! Their eggs got hot and wouldn’t hatch. Their food was scared and hard to catch. They tried to find a cooler spot, but everywhere on earth was hot.

In old days people didn’t know that penguins only growed in snow! We learned a lot. So now we take the genes from fossil things and make new things that grow most anywhere, like hedgehog grass and kudzubear, like thornydog and chickenweed that guard our house and help to feed our families. Inside the dome our food won’t bite or wilt or roam. They fixed the problem, just in time when natural got made a crime.